I haven’t felt all that inspired to write recently. I think it comes from a lack of doing anything. This whole week has been pretty boring. For three days I had no work. If you think about it, that would’ve been a really good time to write some extra stuff down, after doing assignments for the Writing 101 course that I’ve been taking, but alas nothing came to mind. I’ve just been feeling numb on the inside about a lot of things recently. Between my job, my injury, and personal life, it all seems to bother me and at the same time it doesn’t. I’ve just been going through the motions from day to day.
Work, when I have it, hasn’t been the greatest. Besides being in pain for the better part of my short shifts, people in the office apparently have problems with me in regards to how the mail is sorted on each route in the office. It’s all petty bullshit and people want to complain about things when, in reality, they really don’t have much to complain about. I work with a bunch of adult-sized, spoiled, privileged, annoying children. They look like functioning adults, but most of them whine and cry like fucking toddlers. It’s ridiculous. Just shut up and do your job and then maybe I wouldn’t be stuck doing your job for you. Learn to fucking grow a pair, if you have a problem with me, come to me and say what you want to say. Don’t send a messenger to do your dirty work, especially when your messenger also has issues with how much you whine and cry about your job. Your job isn’t mentally challenging, any goon can do it. I feel embarrassed to be one of the youngest people in the building, yet my maturity far exceeds those who have been working there LONGER THAN THE TIME THAT IVE BEEN ALIVE.
My injury just seems to never end. Two months I’ve had this sprained ankle. I’m still in a lot of pain and dealing with swelling. I got results from my MRI back and it says that there was no serious long-term damage and that its just not healing and that the sprain itself was kind of bad and that I sprained the major tendon in my right foot/ankle. I was upgraded from a flimsy basic air cast/bandage combo to an actual orthopedic boot. That’s something that should have happened long ago, people. Also, I’ve pretty much have run out of painkillers. My doctor knows I’m in pain, and yet didn’t prescribe me anything. It’s annoying. So I’ve had to come up with creative pill combos to help ease my pain and get me to sleep at night, otherwise I just toss and turn. No, it’s probably not the safest thing to do. In all honesty, the painkillers I had, weren’t doing too much for me anyway. I couldn’t feel any effect of them actually working. Hopefully this boost will do the trick.
I feel like my personal life is a mess and its just going to stay that way no matter what I attempt to do. It’s highly discouraging. There’s only been two of my friends who have personally asked for updates on my foot. I get that everyone is busy with their own life with school and work and whatnot, but its not everyday that your friend is suffering so badly in all aspects of her life, from an injury that isn’t all that mediocre. Maybe it’s because I have too much time on my hands right now, but I feel forgotten by a bunch of people. My Netflix account can only be a substitute for friendship for so long. I’m bored. I don’t get out of the house much, except for work or the occasional errand. Dating has become harder as well. Because I’m in so much pain “hooking up” is totally off of the table and in the society we live in, that’s all guys want to do now. They don’t bother with actual courtship or wooing. Hell, its pulling teeth to get a guy to take me to get fucking Chipotle at this point. It’s obnoxious.
Anyway, I think I can feel my pill cocktail slowly hitting me. These lids of mine are getting harder and harder to hold up. I think its time to put my ankle on ice and get to bed. Maybe I’ll actually get a full night’s sleep for the first time in about 2 months. Wouldn’t that be nice, however more than likely unrealistic.